Your inner wisdom has the solutions
At 44 years of age, I walked away from my business and my 2nd husband. Having arrived at 7 digit revenues under my management I didn’t have the emotional capacity for the next level of growth. As a perfectionist, I was holding the reins too tightly. Someone else had to take charge or I would watch my biz baby decline. Relationships remained a mystery to me. I "threw in the towel", and became a single mum of a 4-year-old son.
Can you imagine what it's like to discover that you are living in the wrong country, with the wrong people, working in an industry that's eating away at your soul? Over the decades I had traded my cherished life of service to others for status, shiny objects and all the trimmings of consumerism including extravagant holidays, leisurely weekends on our yacht, drawers full of makeup and french perfumes, designer clothes, handbags and shoes. There were many things to love about it, don't get me wrong. It came with a price and the price was too high. The outside looked fabulous, on the inside I was dying.
enough was enough!
Have you ever had that feeling that you have travelled so far away from who you really are, that you don't even recognise yourself? I was lost. I was miserable. And then this. In my search for answers, I reluctantly watched the movie "The Secret". In the very last scene Rhonda Byrne wrote these words in the sand...FEEL GOOD! Those words hit me like a bolt from the blue. It took me 3 weeks to remember half a dozen things that made me feel good. I knew I was in trouble. And I knew things had to change. My jumbo garbage bin was not big enough for all the surplus makeup, french perfumes, and unworn Italian shoes that represented my people-pleasing, soul-destroying path to meet other people's expectations. Anything that symbolised my life built on trying to meet someone else's idea of who I was, or should be, went into that bin. (Okay, I could have thought that through a bit more!) Next I needed to find a way to empty out the garbage of my inner world (beliefs, expectations, attitudes, rules, and all other forms of BS) that was driving my life and informing the way I show up.
I discovered how to listen to my inner stories AND review, revise and release them.
It changed my life.
At the age of 6 years I developed chronic asthma - for me, it was a psychosomatic illness. Here's what that means.
adjective 1. (of a physical illness or other condition) caused or aggravated by a mental factor such as internal conflict or stress.
synonyms:(all) in the mind, psychological, irrational, stress-related, stress-induced, subjective, subconscious, unconscious "a diagnosis of psychosomatic illness should not be made lightly"
And yes, you read that correctly, I was 6 years old. Finding a solution to my emotional world has always been a top priority.
Whenever I feel emotionally triggered, whether that trigger is intense or subtle, whenever I feel any inner conflict at all, I initiate my self-mastery process. It's part of my every day and it keeps me well, and happier than I have ever been. As a high-achieving woman, I'm all about the detail, drive and success, and I had to find a way to access my inner world from that perspective. I take time out to connect with my inner world and discover how the present situation is activating an old story that is ready to be released. This is how I find, and fine-tune, my inner compass in any situation that is triggering me, and I rediscover what I need to feel good.
life-changing adjustments in a snap
It started with feeling good. The more I focussed on feeling good, the more I became aligned with, and accessed my inner wisdom.
Along the way I've discovered how to move from feeling stuck in a meaningless existence, not knowing how to make the changes I was looking for, to building my confidence, experiencing more clarity, ease and direction in my life, in my relationships, with my health and in my business because I was…
willing to become an objective observer of my life experiences
determined to discover and release old stories and patterned behaviours that were no longer useful
craving more energy, and more ease and more meaning in my life
driven to gain more confidence, release self-doubt and to do whatever it takes to be the best version of myself
Your worldview, including your decisions and choices are informed by old conditioning that is passed its use-by date
What's most important about that is the way that you make meaning of that conditioning. The stories you tell yourself and the beliefs you hold as true, formed from your life experiences, and inherited from your family and ancestors are all held in your deep "procedural" memory. "Procedural" because it was formed prior to the age of 3. It forms the foundation of your inner operating programme, the programme that drives your choices and decisions in the here and now.
You will be amazed at how your life will change
I use self-mastery to...
resolve relationship problems
bring more meaning into my life
make better business and life choices
determine business direction
to gain clarity
to overcome self-doubt
to build confidence
to resolve self-sabotaging behaviours
deal with every emotional trigger
It works for me. How will it work for you?
My mentoring programme, TOWARDS SELF-MASTERY provides you with insights into your way of processing life that will shift you out of stuck in stress and defensive modes, and enable you to return to social engagement mode. You'll learn how to activate that part of the vagus nerve that is responsible for creating subtle social cues to signal to others that you are safe and friendly to be around.
I was amazed at the cues I was putting out that signalled a lack of trust in others and resulted in conflict.
Activating your social engagement mode is essential for spontaneous connection and collaboration with clients, business partners, colleagues, investors, your team, family and friends, as well as for the energy and creativity to design
and build both your business and your life.
short tempered, angry, overwhelmed, shut down, frenetic, reactive
Super Vigilant Mode
anxious, cautious, untrusting, expecting the worse, defensive, critical, on edge
Social Engagement Mode
spontaneous, responsive, feel safe, secure, stable and trusting, creative, relational, clear
When you are stuck in stress and super vigilant modes you are always on the defensive. This means, without even realising it, you are pushing away, holding yourself apart from, creating a barrier to receiving the people and things (read clients, bosses, opportunities, family and income) you want in your business and in life.
Advances in leading edge sciences enable us to grasp an understanding of "the field" of experience that we are all contributing to and being influenced by. The science of Epigenetics and advances in psychological research and theories such as Field Theory, Polyvagal Theory, the Paradoxical Theory of Change and others, inform us that it’s much more than simply “all in your head”. Quantum sciences and related research demonstrate the unique and mysterious nature of our human experience. These sciences inform my work.
A little more about me...
I’ve been an entrepreneur of 3 very successful SMEs for 20 years. My 2nd and most successful business, an importing and distribution business in the office automation industry, achieved 7 digit revenues under my care, and is still operational some 25 years later. I'm proud of that. My 3rd business, a childcare franchise established 3 franchises under my stewardship.
My work is informed by a wealth of lived experience that includes the deep learning achieved by overcoming a lifetime of emotional challenges.
I’m a mother to one amazing son, and a sister to 7 siblings.
I hold a Graduate Certificate in Gestalt Psychotherapy. I’m a Certified BodyTalk Practitioner of BodyTalk Energy Psychology, and a former nurse and midwife of some 18 years. I've studied extensively in business and financial management and consolidated my learning with practical experience.
Currently, I’m completing a Masters programme of Gestalt Psychotherapy, and will be graduating in Feb 2021. I also am continually experiencing and learning about the mind-body-energy connection at a deeper level through personal experience.
I’ve been studying the human condition for all of my adult life, both formally and informally.
I know that everyone has the innate ability to know them self deeply. By doing so, you are able to review and spontaneously adjust conditioning that is the blueprint for your life experiences, and live your most authentic, genuine self.
When you resolve to live from your most genuine self, your health will improve, you’ll step into more personal inner strength and stability, you’ll develop closer and more caring relationships, and you’ll be recognized and acknowledged for the value that you bring. From your most genuine self you are able to have immense positive impact on those closest to you, and the causes that inspire you.
* Support: giving and receiving support enables us to grow and thrive
* Being open to potentials: no form of programming enhances the human spirit
* Collaboration: working together builds personal and community resilience
* Connection: the quality of our connections informs the quality of our relationships
* Our uniqueness: each individual has their own unique way of managing their world
* Nature: as one of my go-to supports and where I learn most about life
* And I never underestimate the value of chocolate when I'm concentrating
My personal ethic: Let it be known that I will respect the sovereignty of all of life by not looking into nor interfering with the life of any living being, nor deliberately take anything from them including information, without their express permission: mind, body, spirit and soul.