Day 82/366 days Towards Self-Mastery. Mood: resolved
What do you think of this concept of acting "as if"? What do you think is its purpose?
To be sure, I'm fairly literal in my approach to life so I might have the wrong end of the stick on this.
From my perspective, when it comes to authenticity, this idea of "acting as if" brings authenticity unstuck.
Is there merit in the idea of tricking your subconscious by using your imagination to pretend you are something you're not. Not to mention, tricking others at the same time. It doesn't sit well with me. I'm pretty sure it doesn't work that way.
What works for me is authenticity. Real authenticity. And the reason it works is because it enables me to connect with others who aren't perfect either.
Sarah's suggestion today is to act "as if" you're really confident when you're not
...at those times when it's time to present yourself to the world and you feel a little less than. Maybe in this situation it's the thing to do. I'm not so sure.
Choose the most confident little number from your wardrobe and act "as if", it's showtime!
Yeah. No. It's not for me. Maybe I'm brutally honest, direct, too real for most people.
When I'm not feeling as confident as I'd like to feel here's what I do. I check in with those feelings and I acknowledge to myself that this is a challenge for me.
Sitting in this lack of confidence for a short time, I feel it in my body and note the sensations and thoughts that arise with it. Giving myself these precious few minutes of reflection is something I'm committed to.
Knowing there's a deeper story there, I explore until that story surfaces. Extending compassion and understanding to myself, I discover something about myself that I had forgotten.
Then I choose the outfit that feels most comforting to me, freshen my look and balance my style. Now I'm ready to emerge and meet the world.
At that interface with the world, I'm more than happy to acknowledge that I don't know something, haven't had experience with this, haven't conquered that. The response from others is delicious! There's a collective sigh, and lowering of shoulders, a softening of facial features.
The permission to be imperfect is infectious!
Deliciously imperfect has even become an artform, grunge, which I have grown to love.
What about you? Are you able to be authentic in your less confident times? Are you willing to acknowledge and show your imperfections?
At this time of the CV-19 everyone's self-confidence is no doubt being challenged. It's a time that is unprecedented and for this reason, in spite of what I think of our less than virtuous leaders, I have to give them some latitude to err.
There's too much pressure to be perfect, to know, to excel. It's not humanly possible, especially as we feel our way forward. Showing up as the imperfect human we all are encourages others to do the same. It's okay.
366 days Towards Self-Mastery
When I considered my New Year's intentions for 2020 I had just one: To allow my heart to love what it loved...and let it lead me. (If not now, then when?)
I've spent months working on integrating my life. To live life more fully with my home life, my interests, my work, my responsibilities, all coming together, all connected. I want to give each the attention that they desire and need, and still have time and energy for the others. That means living and working from the heart.
As I was clearing out my bookshelf over the Christmas break I discovered Simple Abundance. I set it aside to explore it on New Year's Day as I lazed through another delicious day of nothingness. Sarah, the author, says this book is about living in grace. Living in grace I realised, is about Self-Mastery.
My thirst for understanding the human condition has driven me all my life, and hand-in-hand with self-mastery it has been a life-long goal. And seeing as I love to write, that living in grace is about self-mastery, and I love a bit of a challenge, then if I am truly going to let my heart lead, I really don't have any other choice. So scary as it feels, I'm starting out on a daily mission of leaning into the suggestions of this daybook and making a daily post to keep me accountable. If not now, then when?
I'm Josie. You can find out a little more about me here.
Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy: by Sarah Ban Breathnach.
This book is written for the Australian and NZ market because it refers to seasonal changes. It's available on Amazon here if you'd like to follow along.