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  • Writer's pictureJosie Coco

How do I feel? How is this for me?

These are the questions that support increasing self-awareness.

Day 72/366 days Towards Self-Mastery. Mood: feeling animated

Personal transformation begins with consistent inner inquiry. If you've looked back and you're not exactly happy with the way things have turned out, your aspirations have not been met and you're wondering where you went wrong, take heart.

Things have a happy knack of not turning out the way we planned.

What you can do is bring more consistency to your outer message. The silent messages you are giving others when you are with them are less about how you look, than how you feel.

It's a myth to think that we can hide how we really feel. The more in touch you are with how you feel, the more consistent your messages to others will become.

Sarah suggests that we need to pay more attention to how we feel, than to how we look.

Next time you're tempted to ask someone, how do I look, think again.

Instead of asking, "how do I look", look yourself in the eye in your mirror and ask "how do I feel". Choose just one inner inquiry tool to support you to get to know yourself better.

So far we've discussed a few tools.

  • Making more room in your life for contemplation

  • Spending more time daydreaming in a nature setting

  • Journaling your feelings to help you make sense of them

  • Being curious about your reactions and responses, choices and decisions

  • Observe yourself in your private and public life

It's a good idea to make a practice each day to spend some time in meditation, or simply quiet contemplation with at least one of these tools in order to learn more about yourself. Self-mastery is about knowing ourselves deeply.

When we know ourselves more deeply, we have more choices at our disposal. The larger portion of my work with mental and emotional health and well-being is supporting and encouraging people to know themselves better.

We tend to jump ahead of ourselves instead of living into each moment of each experience. We tend to dismiss our successes in favour of wondering what's wrong with us.

There is never a time when you are not perfectly where you are meant to be. There is nothing wrong with you. There maybe things about you that you don't know well, and this is your opportunity to begin to discover them.

This blog is supposed to be about my experiences, I know, yet I can't help feeling frustrated for those that are learning the lessons the hard way as I did, and that took me so long to learn. I didn't have someone who could guide me with that inner inquiry. Don't let that be you.

These blogs might give you some insights. If you struggle. get some help. A good therapist, and in particular, a psychotherapist, will be an enormous support. Find someone you resonate with. I can help. If you think I might be able to help you, make contact through the contact form on this website. Reach out.

When I discovered my current therapist, I knew immediately that this woman would be an incredible ally. It just happened. I followed my knowing and made the decision I wouldn't settle on a therapist until I was 100% happy. I found the perfect therapist for me. I hope you do also.

Make the commitment to get to know yourself deeply and honestly. The rewards are innumerable, life-changing. You'll understand what's really important in your life, you'll simplify your life, you'll have more focus on the direction that you decide to go, you'll act on inspiration, you won't suffer from other's opinions, you'll open to the brilliance of YOUR life. Self-mastery.

Until tomorrow...


Simple Abundance

366 days Towards Self-Mastery

When I considered my New Year's intentions for 2020 I had just one: To allow my heart to love what it loved...and let it lead me. (If not now, then when?)

I've spent months working on integrating my life. To live life more fully with my home life, my interests, my work, my responsibilities, all coming together, all connected. I want to give each the attention that they desire and need, and still have time and energy for the others. That means living and working from the heart.

As I was clearing out my bookshelf over the Christmas break I discovered Simple Abundance. I set it aside to explore it on New Year's Day as I lazed through another delicious day of nothingness. Sarah, the author, says this book is about living in grace. Living in grace I realised, is about Self-Mastery.

My thirst for understanding the human condition has driven me all my life, and hand-in-hand with self-mastery it has been a life-long goal. And seeing as I love to write, that living in grace is about self-mastery, and I love a bit of a challenge, then if I am truly going to let my heart lead, I really don't have any other choice. So scary as it feels, I'm starting out on a daily mission of leaning into the suggestions of this daybook and making a daily post to keep me accountable. If not now, then when?

I'm Josie. You can find out a little more about me here.

Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy: by Sarah Ban Breathnach.

This book is written for the Australian and NZ market because it refers to seasonal changes. It's available on Amazon here if you'd like to follow along.


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