Day 158/366 days Towards Self-Mastery.
Black Lives Matter.
Everyday we get to make meaning of our lives and experiences.
This week I have found to be particularly difficult emotionally as we are immersed in the race riots in the USA, and all the rhetoric that files through social media feeds.
Truly, to be engaged there is to be self-sabotaging or perhaps self-destructive.
When it comes to events that move us deeply, the only real work is the inner work. What is there that this event is stirring in me? What is it that is left in me from previous experiences, from my beliefs and attitudes or expectations, that has surfaced with this issue?
If you can answer those questions, your life changes, and consequently what you do with it, what and who you support, what you feed into the collective, it all changes. By looking inwards and finding what is there that is unresolved.
Once I've done this its time to look for resolution. What is it in this current situation that I can hang onto that enables me to let go of the grieving and find the silver lining? There is always both polarities in every life situations. Incredible difficult to find them sometimes, however grief asks us to look for what we can influence or change or simply retain, and let go of the rest.
It was a woman of colour who reminded me that this was a very positive thing happening. The bringing of these issues into the light in this way is so necessary for our continued evolution. To begin to put things right in American society and here in Australia as well. Anywhere where indigenous and people of colour have been disadvantaged, and that's everywhere there has been colonisation, wrongs need to be addressed. She encouraged me to celebrate with her. Such a delight to have this reframed for me this week.
As hard and as difficult as it has been for some, especially those injured and murdered, George Floyd and his family, other people of colour, and the police who have been injured and killed as well. It's extremely sad, and it's a turning point in history.
I have learned, and will continue to examine my acculturated biases, have conversations with neighbours and friends and family, be more attentive and diligent in my dialogue and sentiments towards people of colour.
Finding internal resolution comes with being able to bring closure to my own suffering which in turn enables me to show up differently in the world. It's a natural part of the process of meaning making which is how we move through life.
How are you doing? What are you experiencing? Are you beginning to find internal resolution with the external chaos?
Don't mistake this necessity to move through your own emotions and find resolution as not being present to the situation. It is this moving through that enables you to be more intelligently present. In spite of what popular psychology out there in the commercial market of mindset managers tells you, it's a necessary and healthy progress through your inner turmoil.
Getting caught up in guilt, sadness, pain, anger...none of that is helpful until you find your own meaning for it. Then step up in silence or actively, whichever serves you and your cause.
Take care of you first.
366 days Towards Self-Mastery
When I considered my New Year's intentions for 2020 I had just one: To allow my heart to love what it loved...and let it lead me. (If not now, then when?)
I've spent months working on integrating my life. To live life more fully with my home life, my interests, my work, my responsibilities, all coming together, all connected. I want to give each the attention that they desire and need, and still have time and energy for the others. That means living and working from the heart.
As I was clearing out my bookshelf over the Christmas break I discovered Simple Abundance. I set it aside to explore it on New Year's Day as I lazed through another delicious day of nothingness. Sarah, the author, says this book is about living in grace. Living in grace I realised, is about Self-Mastery.
My thirst for understanding the human condition has driven me all my life, and hand-in-hand with self-mastery it has been a life-long goal. And seeing as I love to write, that living in grace is about self-mastery, and I love a bit of a challenge, then if I am truly going to let my heart lead, I really don't have any other choice. So scary as it feels, I'm starting out on a daily mission of leaning into the suggestions of this daybook and making a daily post to keep me accountable. If not now, then when?
I'm Josie. You can find out a little more about me here.
Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy: by Sarah Ban Breathnach.
This book is written for the Australian and NZ market because it refers to seasonal changes. It's available on Amazon here if you'd like to follow along.