It's an interesting life
Day 356/366 days Towards Self-Mastery.
This exercise revisiting my journeying towards self-mastery, reflecting on the inspirations from Sarah's book has been an excellent opportunity to revisit the stories of my life, ponder the lessons and appreciate the wisdom gained.
It's been a tough and difficult journey. I've had a lot of unravelling to do. In my mind, the early years were crazy making. I've spent a lifetime making sense of it all.
At times it seemed desperate and hopeless, at others I felt hopeful of progress and success. Sometimes I still swing between the two.
It's easy to lose my way again, and it's getting easier to find my way back to appreciating the life I've created for myself.
When I lose my creativity, when my energy drains away, when I can't think clearly and struggle to make good contact with my kitty or my garden, I know those are the cues that my mind has wandered to parts to my internal garden that are barren and fruitless.
It might take a few days to recognise that I've headed back down that rabbit hole, and then I have to find the way back to bring myself out of it.
When I'm inspired and connected I feel so alive. I really need to feel more and more of that. As far as I have come, I still have so much further to go, and so much more life to feel. My senses are learning to be engaged at a higher and more vibrant level. However the old neurological pathways are well honed and it's easy to get back in the old groove.
It's an interesting life. I can't say as Sarah has, that it's a wonderful life. That's not my adjective. I can say, it's an interesting life, fascinating in many respects. Maybe the next 30 years will turn it into a wonderful life. That would be an experience worth having.
366 days Towards Self-Mastery
When I considered my New Year's intentions for 2020 I had just one: To allow my heart to love what it loved...and let it lead me. (If not now, then when?)
I've spent months working on integrating my life. To live life more fully with my home life, my interests, my work, my responsibilities, all coming together, all connected. I want to give each the attention that they desire and need, and still have time and energy for the others. That means living and working from the heart.
As I was clearing out my bookshelf over the Christmas break I discovered Simple Abundance. I set it aside to explore it on New Year's Day as I lazed through another delicious day of nothingness. Sarah, the author, says this book is about living in grace. Living in grace I realised, is about Self-Mastery.
My thirst for understanding the human condition has driven me all my life, and hand-in-hand with self-mastery it has been a life-long goal. And seeing as I love to write, that living in grace is about self-mastery, and I love a bit of a challenge, then if I am truly going to let my heart lead, I really don't have any other choice. So scary as it feels, I'm starting out on a daily mission of leaning into the suggestions of this daybook and making a daily post to keep me accountable. If not now, then when?
I'm Josie. You can find out a little more about me here.
Simple Abundance: A Daybook of Comfort and Joy: by Sarah Ban Breathnach.
This book is written for the Australian and NZ market because it refers to seasonal changes. It's available on Amazon here if you'd like to follow along.